i always thought i was the luckiest girl on earth. had the best boyfriend, had a stable relationship, had family and his family. perfect. my foundation was stable enough to let me figure what i wanted in life. i'd work hard and we could achieve a life we want, somehow, someday. people that would be there for me no matter what. because they promised. but it turns out i conjured everything up myself. 全都是我自己想出来的。sometimes love is not enough. sometimes seeing the good is not enough.

to think i bothered this much, to want to swim oceans across to an island where i am not welcome.
https://www.reddit.com/r/entj/comments/6jc7fo/perhaps_entjs_could_explain_this_better_to_me/