i. survived a 12h shift with zero sleep from 4am the day before
coke is my happy drink

ii. walking expressways in order to get sleep: 15k steps is a sure way to get a night of sleep.
it feels weird to have somebody's perspective of growth imposed on you. even weirder to come to the realisation that blame is projected on you when you know full well it was never my life commitment that changed

iii. entjs understand entjs best. is there a point in trying to find good in their darnedest qualities? time will tell. read your old blog because i remembered it exists - "This is life isn’t it. You are always too focused on obtaining new things that you lose focus on what you currently have. I should really start to appreciate what I have before time makes me appreciate what i had. Word." funny how things are repeating itself, except i cannot be sure if you will miss me at all.

iv. i've turned to reading others experiences and even turned to internet strangers. it must be uni, i hear the whispers. i know you mean well but i still feel you're being selfish at this moment. but who could be mad? you are your own best investment after all. that's the problem ain't it? i am never mad because i could understand. being understanding is my own downfall.

v. i opened things i wish i didn't. does this mean my gut feeling was right? if it is then you're a letdown. to think i keep spending time thinking of how to better myself for you. what a joke.

i numbered this to last months but it's over now. goodbye.