Sunday, July 15, 2012

Go on and cry a tsunami for us.

Have been mad upset about things recently but i shall start with the happy ones:

Just supz grateful for all the people i have in my life, i couldn't ask for better friends really.

See my totoros?!
 Was just plain bored in class and out of nowhere and for no reason Max showed up in my class with my favourite totoros that he folded, with sweets inside somemore. Just :')
   
- Lunch bunch! ^~^v                                 - Chloe's party with 3k-peeps!!!
 

Had a great day out yesterday with the very wonderful 3K classmates, i shall update more on this when our dear birthday girl has uploaded the photos we took, hehe. OH and yes i know i haven't posted Penang pictures hahaha but that is because i still do not have the photos so oops.

Just so angsty this whole week, i can legit call this an episode of major highs and manic lows.
You need to learn to stop being so selfish and expect everyone to crawl back to you all the time. Just because you are nursing a heartbreak it doesn't mean that you suddenly have the right to be a cunt. You just can't face reality. Everyone keeps trying and all of us now are just tired and lost at what to do anymore. No matter how times you apologise, you're not getting the fucking point. You ruined things yourself, face it, accept it and get. over. it. It's not how you make it out to seem like, like all this chaos is here cause you're unworthy. No, it is because you are constantly wallowing in your own self pity which is really pathetic, and what do all of us get for trying to help you? Pushed away, and then blamed for not caring, then the whole world gets blamed for not caring about, in your own words, a worthless being. And you dare say you are not wallowing in self pity. Be gentle with our words so it doesn't hurt you, nope didn't work. Be slightly harsher? Nope still didn't work. Be harsh to you? NOPE, STILL NO. So what if you ruined things yourself, get over it, stop saying something doesn't exist or things are lies cause you're only 15. Learn from it, forgive yourself, forgive others, stop your emotional bullshit, it's not like we haven't suggested to you to get new things/people/hobbies in your life. It is your choice to be sad or happy. Period. Don't say "oh my emotions don't allow me to" You can look at the clouds and be grateful it is sunny. You can look at your house keys and be glad you have home. Heck, you can even look at your dog and be glad he isn't dead. You can even look at your classroom and be thankful people are spending their precious time educating you. You just choose to do it seriously. Why not spend your time making cards to your classmates who have been trying their best to cheer you up right? We all knows it takes time to get over the break up but while being at it you don't have to waste your entire life away and thrive on other's sympathy and keep thinking ERMAHGERD Y DO I LIVE NUTHIN LASTS 4EVER NOBODY CARES BOO FREAKING HOO. One moment you're all over it and the other you're all over his old messages and being sarcastic. You'll be happy if he is happy? Please. You're not the only one hurt here and definitely not the most miserable. S e l f i s h . Nobody knows what you want anymore okay, don't even tell me it's not worth it: just... just shut up.

P/S: Parents give me a break too please, especially you dad. Just... wtf.
So positive everyday and nothing is positive is coming my way.

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