w0w wow today i feel utterly helpless and shitty (and even useless) because despite the amount of books, sentences, phrases and words i have hoarded over my entire lifetime, i just cannot find any that would be of any use or comfort to him. i can't seem to string any words i have in mind that would not come out cliche... or be of any use at all. afterall, who am i to be saying anything when i don't understand at all? it sucks because it will be technically beyond me to understand or change anything for the better. i'm just stuck here; maybe this is the kind of the helpless they always talk about when a loved one is caught in a situation you can never improve. all i want now is to hug him better but we're far apart. wew sometimes i wish i was enough... and maybe better

extra sigh pie because i can't get to go home because i've to pull an all-nighter to complete work and i feel so... not at home and upset.......................... this week is not my... or our week

this time i'm not gonna ask You why him or why me or why us, this time i'm just gonna trust that it's all for something better