T1W1; i am stressed about everything under the sun.

I constantly feel like i am running out of time;

but at the same time, i feel like i am stuck in void.

I don't want to deal with time.

lame ass pic but all that matters is the audio

Us on Heidi's.

we need to do this more often.

Abrupt ending but nothing mattered but us that night

“In the passenger seat of your car, I ask you what

color the burnt orange of the leather seats are and you tell me

burnt orange. My cheeks in the rearview mirror are the color

of burning, and when I look down at my hands, they’re so pale

that I forget for a moment that I own flesh over these bones.

The fog is so thick that I could lose you in it again, you say —

and I put my hand on your hand until I mix our fingers up.

There is a shipwreck between your ribs and it took eighteen years

for me to understand how to understand your kind of drowning.

The divorce papers say Christmas and July. That’s all you were given

to touch the cheeks of your small daughters and try to tell them in 

smaller and smaller words how absence does not mean 

leaving.

The first and last time I saw my parents together was in a 

parking lot at McDonalds. They didn’t speak to each other, didn’t

look each other in the eye — only handed me between them

like an insult.

When I got into my father’s car, he handed me a Happy Meal toy

like an apology.

There are people who cannot be held quietly. There are screams

that are never externalized. If I looked at the photo albums of your

past twenty years, all I would find are decibel meter graphs of

phone calls and the intensity of your silence as you sat 

smoking cigarettes in the garage.

Absence doesn’t make the heart grow fonder, scientists

have finally proven.

All it does is make you that much more aware of how many

feet it takes to walk a mile.

There is a shipwreck between your ribs. You are a box with

fragile written on it, and so many people have not handled you

with care.

And for the first time, I understand that I will never know

how to apologize for being

one of them.”

— “What It Took To Understand,” Shinji Moon